Yesterday's snooze fest was not without historical purpose, since the pause will allow the Dow Industrial Average to set a new record high on a Friday -- a theatrical flourish that we could have expected. The Indoos settled yesterday at 13913, meaning they will have to rack up only a further 109 points this morning to achieve the milestone. The only question is whether the blue chip average will slip back to finish the day below record highs, or instead hold onto enough of its gains to close at a new record. Either way, the words 'Record High' are going to find their way into this evening's headlines, giving investors something to feel smug about over the weekend. And yet, even as I write these words, business reporters for the Wall Street Journal and the New York Times are probably pecking away diligently at weekend-edition stories intended to raise doubts about the stock market's performance -- or rather, to affirm the doubts we already have, seeing the stock market at record highs while news from the housing sector grows grimmer by the day. Unfortunately, because deadline pressures tend to make reporters habitually go for the easy story, none of them will get it right. (Full disclosure: I was a newspaper reporter and editor myself for seven years.) Instead, they will quote self-aggrandizing charlatans like Larry Kudlow, who would say absolutely anything to get in front of the camera; or even worse, credentialed imbeciles who are so frighteningly stupid as to actually believe there are valid reasons for the stock market to be acting so bullishly. Metaphysical Forces The real reasons are more complex, however, touching even on the metaphysical. Which is to say, the Indoos are trading at record highs for the same reason that Jupiter and Mars are where they
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